wow. ancient history. and I am a only a little sad.

About 10 years ago I had a friend in college who was the most. He was so cool and prettier than me and we had the most fun concocting these totally absurd a crazy what-if fantasies that would last for days. I remember one had us ultimately married for the sake of something I can't remember now and I would wear only my black lace-up boots and an apron and have dinner ready when he came home from a day at the office. It was something that kept us laughing for hours.


I was super sad when for reasons too personal and not all bad we weren't close the way we we used to be. But for a couple years, it was the best fun I may have ever had.

We spent a semester working on a 'collaborative' project photographing the nightlife in some local gay clubs. He had a few 'ins' and sometimes we'd set up illegally, which was really a challenge because many people lead double lives and the sight of a camera causes extreme anxiety and anger. Of course, sometimes it inspires intense hamming.

Anyway, I did not have a personal relationship to gay culture outside of my relationship to Patty, but I felt inspired by the color, light, dark and rampant overt sexuality, which really feeds my voyeuristic tendencies. I cannot speak to how this might have been the same/different in other types of clubs, and I had always meant to go back to this subject.

In any case, back to the aspects of collaboration... it worked because we were 2 different people of different genders and different cultures sharing ideas, inspiration, shooting and printing techniques. We fed each other the same fodder with spoons but shit out very different styles and bodies. Nevertheless, they were complimentary and important because of how we shared and supported each other without envy, angst or backstabbing.

I do not know if the work is great- it was either the first or second semester of me using color so it was all new. But it was good. And it was ours. Together and independently.

Recently, I have been undergoing and reviewing 'historical' works, meaning the development of my work prior to 2007. I have a humongous archive of negatives that may never see the light of day, but more important is my history of using multiple media sources, appropriation, collaboration and a general consumption of images and ideas in my work. I think sometimes in 2001 in my environment, it was hard for others to understand using photoshop and appropriation as fine art. There were a few of us who ended up working almost entirely digital by graduation. Of course, it was only a year later that digital became mandatory even though I had the sense the faculty still had yet to understand what working digital means. And maybe I am being rude.

Nevertheless, this last body of purely filmic work is important to me and I hold it very dear. I miss the process of film, but I am grateful that I am one of the last classes who had the choice of that adventure.

I have just come across the transcript from my formal review of that work which I believe was the first of  the last 2 portfolio semesters senior year. What a treasure and what unbelievable foresight I had to not only have recorded the session, but then to transcribe it and hide it among my archive of writing. When I find images from this series, I will post them here.

I am always grateful for those years of extreme fun and education.